Books that will turn you on

It’s pretty cold outside! And how could you relax better than by cuddling up in bed and reading an erotic book and then trying everything you read about with your partner or indulge in some sexy solo play? I can assure you, those cold long winter nights will soon become pretty hot!! 😉

Here are some of my favorite picks when it comes to luscious stories and techniques that are guaranteed to turn you on:

Lust: Erotic Fantasies for Women by Violet Blue

Who can live without lust? All day and night, our minds run through delicious possibilities — a silky hand beckoning us into the VIP lounge; a stranger in the backseat; the hunky FedEx driver bringing his package to the door — not to mention our own lascivious memories. Lust is a collection of erotica by and for women, a fierce and joyous celebration of female desire — and the triple-X trouble it gets us into. In Kay Jaybee’s “Tied to the Kitchen Sink,” a birthday boy finds his present — nude except for tall, high-heeled boots — happily devoted to domestic duties. Maria Grigoriadis’ “Pleasant Surprise” shows what can happen when you knock on the wrong apartment door — without your panties. And Bonnie Dee’s “Ripe Fruit” teasingly elaborates the sweet, sticky encounter of a soap opera idol and a fruit-stand employee on a stretch of rural roadside.

Girls on Top: Explicit Erotica for Women by Violet Blue

Prolific editrix Violet Blue presents another blazing hot set of erotic shorts by women, for women.  This commanding collection shows how exciting life can be when a woman takes control of her own pleasure, as in S.J. Frost’s “Quarterbacking,” an inspiring tale of first time girl-on-top domination.  Foot fetishism and saucy teasing meet in Elizabeth Colvin’s “High Heels.”  B.J. Franklin’s portrayal of gripping group sex in “The Hostage” and the delectable exhibitionism in Virgie Tovar’s “New York Peep Show” feature women who break all the rules to get off.  Filled with surprises, unexpected twists, and arousing confessionals, Girls on Top confirms that anything is possible when a girl wants, takes, gets!

Luscious: Stories of Anal Erotica by Alison Tyler and Tristan Taormino

A celebration of anal sex! With 27 stories by today’s hottest authors, telling us tales of all the ins and outs of this popular and sometimes secret sexual practice. Anal sex isn’t so dirty, especially when you are into making someone’s butt feel so good! Talk of toys, boys, strapping it on, licking it up and more are all included in this collection.

Tickle Your Fancy: A Woman’s Guide to Sexual Self-Pleasure by Sadie Allison

A fabulous bite-sized yet complete ‘how-to’ guide to women’s self-pleasure. This fun, guilt-free book details much about paddling the pink canoe- including anatomy, fantasy, orgasms, tools and techniques, anal play, sex toys, and safety.

Toygasms: An insider’s guide to sex toys and techniques by Sadie Allison

From the author of Tickle Your Fancy, comes a guide to choosing and using the best toys for you and your lover. Plus, it includes ways to use them that maximize your pleasure. This pocket-sized and easy to read book covers all the basics of using toys.

The Smart Girl’s Guide to Porn by Violet Blue

Acclaimed sex educator Violet Blue tells women how to find porn they’ll like, from favorite turn-ons and women-friendly DVDs to Podcasts and porn groups on the web. She shows how to reconcile fantasy with real-life desires, and how smart girls can maintain their own beauty standards when the people on screen seem impossibly buff, smooth, and surgically enhanced. Looking for authentic sex scenes? Thinking of sharing porn with a lover? Wonder which browser is safest for Internet porn surfing? This book has the answers.

How To Tell A Naked Man What To Do by Candida Royalle

After 20 years making adult films from a female perspective, Candida Royalle knows how to tell a naked man what to do. This fun, highly readable guide, by the director known for her women-friendly porn (StudHunters, Eyes of Desire, Caribbean Heat), will help you make sure your lover knows how to please you every time.

Bedroom Games: Stripteases, seductions and other surprises to keep your partner coming back for more by Mary Taylor

The lights are low. Your favorite sultry tunes are playing quietly in the background. A scented candle is burning. Your man sits in the center of the room, eagerly awaiting the surprise you’ve been planning for weeks. Slowly, you make your entrance, dressed in a little black number you bought on the sly. As his jaw drops you slink toward him, moving to the rhythm of the music. And the night has only just begun.

Former exotic dancer Mary Taylor offers a wealth of advice for women on how to cast aside their insecurities and inhibitions. Full of tips on choosing the right time, setting, music, lighting, costume, and persona, and step-by-step instructions on basic and more advanced striptease moves, Bedroom Games is your key to turning your (and his!) most secret sexual fantasies into reality and giving the man in your life a night he won’t soon forget!

The Ultimate Guide to Sexual Fantasy: How to Turn Your Fantasies Into Reality by Violet Blue

Whether you’re looking for an endless supply of fantasy ideas or expert advice for a playful, imaginative sex life that turns you both on, this charming and information-packed book will tell you exactly what you need to know:

* Role-play: hot, dramatic sex without feeling silly
* How to have a threesome—without jealousy
* How to have sex in public
* Thrilling S/M scenarios
* Racy sex games for lovers
* How to strip, lap dance, talk dirty
* Make your own porn and erotic photographs

Urban Tantra: Sacred Sex for the Twenty-First Century by Barbara Carrellas

Tantric sex is a making quite the impression upon many – both those drawn to the spiritual connection between sexuality and physicality and those simply looking for new sensations. Within Urban Tantra, readers will find excellent techniques, meditations, helpful drawings, info about the basics of Tantra, and how modern lovers can apply all these ideas in their busy lives. If Tantric sex has always piqued your interest, but the new age-y aspects seemed too much, Urban Tantra is a great resource to satisfy your curiosities and give you practical information to get your soul flying!

Your Orgasmic Pregnancy by Danielle Cavallucci and Yvonne Fulbright

Here’s the inside scoop on sex during pregnancy:  It can be passionate, painless and completely safe!  During these magical nine months, you’ll develop luscious new curves and boast a heightened libido and an increased ability to orgasm.  So don’t be misled by old taboos and myths: Sex while you’re pregnant can be the best you’ve ever had.

Danielle Cavallucci, a pregnancy fitness specialist, has partnered with noted sexologist Yvonne Fulbright to bring pregnant women and their partners this potent brew of tips and techniques for intimacy and great sex.  The authors discuss: safe sexual techniques; how to spice it up with toys, lingerie and erotica; sexy alternatives to intercourse; and ways for a Hot Mama to love herself.

For partners, the book offers tips and suggestions to help keep up with their pregnant partner’s progress, embrace her changes and share in the steamy fun between the sheets.  Throughout the book, Cavallucci and Fulbright prescribe a “love yourself” mindset that emphasizes a positive attitude, confident intercourse and making pregnancy a “growing” experience in more ways than one.

Enjoy reading, and make sure to leave your books lying around, so that your partner can have a look, too, and share your new wisdom! 😉

Yours,

Nomi Tang

World AIDS Day – Safety first!

Hi there!

Today is World AIDS Day, so I thought it might be a good idea to update you with some facts and figures regarding this disease.

During my research on this occasion, I found out that about 0,8% of the world population between 15 and 49 years is HIV-infected. That’s nearly 1 in every 100 adults and makes a total of 34.3 million people! Of course, the geographical area that is most affected is Sub-Saharan Africa, where the percentage of infected adults reaches as high as 8,6% (and there are many sick children, too), but AIDS also is a very serious problem in the so called modern, Western world. Worldwide, more than 80% of all adult HIV infections have resulted from heterosexual intercourse, and almost half of the infected adults are women (47%).

I don’t want to scare you with these numbers, I just want to remind you, that AIDS is not something our parents and teachers told us about, and now that we are older we do not have to worry about it anymore.

You probably know what to do in order to protect yourself and others against AIDS. However, let’s recall the basics: Use a new condom every time you have sex, even in a monogamous relationship (you never know what your partner is up to…). Get tested regularly. Know, that the test result indicates your status from about three months ago. If you share your sex toys, clean them thoroughly after every use. In the heat of the moment, remember that a second of ignorance can mean a deadly disease. So far, there is no cure for AIDS.

I want to encourage you to wear the red ribbon – not only today, but every day of your life. And I am not only talking about the physical ribbon you attach to your jacket or purse. I am talking about the mental awareness you should have concerning AIDS.

And trust me condoms can make sex more fun rather than ruining the experience. Just get a wide variety of colors, shapes, flavors and textures and present them as some kind of a menu to whoever your lover is. He will want to have sex more often to try them all. 😉

Take care,

Nomi Tang

 

Nomi Tang proud sponsor of the 2010 Feminist Porn Awards

This year, I’m a proud sponsor of the Good For Her Feminist Porn Awards! To be exact, “better than chocolate” will be featured at the dessert buffet as we are the Diamond Hospitality Sponsor! Sweet Pleasures is our business, how good is that? 😉

The Feminist Porn Awards is hosted by my friends at Good For Her Adult Boutique and will be held on April 8th and 9th in Toronto. The official website with more detailed info about the different award categories can be found here: http://www.goodforher.com/fpa_2010.

So, why did I decide to support this event? Well, for one I am supporting the Awards because they attract some of the most dedicated boutique owners, sex educators and lovely people from all over the world and I would like to give back for the support that they extend to my young brand. But through the sponsorship I also came to realize how much there is to Feminist Porn today. When I first learned about the Awards, my first question was:
Isn’t there a contradiction between “feminism” and “porn”?

Well, after all much of today’s mainstream porn production is targeting men, and often presents unnatural, stereotypical characters. So I guess what many women tend to do is to ignore porn and simply not watch it. But I have to say, that watching porn can be quite stimulating and it is a nice way to get new ideas to shake up your sex life. We all know that the world is inundated with cheesy, cliche, degrading, no-budget, patronizing and stupid porn. But we also believe that erotic fantasy is powerful stuff, and that women deserve to put their dreams and desires on film too. That’s why a group of visionaries started the feminist porn business, following the logic of Annie Sprinkle who says: “The answer to bad porn is not no porn. It’s better porn!”. I vigorously agree with Annie.

Feminist porn is defined as “Porn which does not portray, promote, or utilize stereotypical gender constructs, exploitative gaze, or highly unnatural, stereotypical appearance standards. Also, the porn would be produced by a company dedicated to equality in all levels of production, promotion, and distribution.”. The goal of the Good For Her Feminist Porn Awards is to honor pornographers whose groundbreaking work offers a fresh perspective on the sexual expression of women and everyone who finds themselves under-represented in mainstream pornography.

The past five years have seen a multitude of improvements in the adult industry as a whole, especially as it pertains to women. Perhaps most important of these is the explosion of female filmmakers looking to change the way that sex is presented on screen. Queer directors are moving away from delicate lesbian sex to authentic representations of the diversity of queer communities and exploring the ways that sex and culture interact. Straight female directors are showing that porn for women doesn’t always have to look like romance novels come to life, but that soft-core and hardcore are equally sought after by discerning female porn viewers.

What follows this growth in female directors, is of course, female viewers. Women are watching porn, talking about porn, buying porn and sharing porn with their partners in record numbers – a reported 1/3 of porn viewers are women, and as many as 9 million women access adult websites per month.

If you would like to check it out for yourself, maybe try these movies: “All about Anna”, “Constance”, “Pink Prison”, Female Fantasies”.

Have a good time 🙂

I am looking forward to the Awards and am proud to be a part of it.

Yours,

Nomi

Never used a vibrator before?

Don’t worry, I won’t tell you that you SHOULD use a vibrator or any other sex toy. This is far from my intention as I see sexuality as a highly personal aspect of one’s life, and nobody is able to tell what is right or wrong except for your own intuition and from what feels right for you.

But as you frequent this blog, I guess the thought about using a vibrator might already have crossed your mind. 🙂
There are various reasons why one might use a vibrator, and various situations to do so. Maybe you are looking for some new excitement for your solo play? Or are keen on trying something different together with your partner? Or you have simply been recommended to use one by a friend of yours and want to try it out of pure curiosity?

Now matter why you are thinking about using a vibrator, I encourage you to do so, as it will enhance your sex life and allows you to get to know your body even better. Worldwide about 25% of all women own at least one vibrator, and in the Western world numbers rise up to 50% and higher! So many women cannot be wrong. 😉

If you plan on using a vibrator for the first time, I suggest you to go for a model designed for clitoral stimulation. This allows you to get used to the handling and different buttons that are common to most sex toys, without having to think about the right size of the toy, your body’s reaction upon insertion or hitting the G-Spot.

Before you start, make sure you have plenty of time to try the toy and explore your body, and that you are in the right mood. Generally, the same advise that I gave last time concerning setting the mood for masturbation applies here. After all, it’s just sex (solo or with a partner), but with a toy.

Of course, there is no “right” way to use a vibrator, just do what feels right for you. But if you have never used one before, here are some hints to make it an enjoyable experience:

1. Use an antibacterial wet wipe or warm soapy water to clean the outside of your toy. If you picked a model that is not waterproof, be careful not to get any water near the battery compartment. Of course this does not apply to my range of vibrators.

2. Get to know your new toy by playing around with the switches and buttons. Make yourself familiar with the different
speeds and vibration patterns it offers.

3. Even if you plan on using a vibrator together with your partner, it might be easier to start on your own. You will feel more self-conscious and won’t be distracted 😉

4. Before turning the vibrator on, touch your body with it turned off. Thereby you get a feel for the sensations the material gives you when it touches your skin. This might also be the moment to decide if you want to apply some lubricant to make the toy slide better over your skin. Please be aware that most toys are made from silicone and should therefore only be used with water-based lubricant to avoid damages of the outer material.

5. Turn your vibrator on and try how the different patterns feel all over your body. Even though vibrators are used mostly around the vulva and clitoris, try slowly moving the vibrator up your inner thigh or in circles around your breasts and nipples before proceeding to your most sensitive parts.

6. Don’t rush! Take your time and explore every inch of your body for sexual pleasure. Experiment with the different speed and pulsation settings. Apply different pressure to your body parts and vary between pointing the tip of the vibrator or the flattest part of it against your body.

7. If you want to use your vibrator for penetration and it’s safe for this purpose (that is no rough edges, and not absorbing body fluids), I recommend to apply some water-based lubricant to the vibrator itself as well as your labia and vagina.

8. When you feel ready to go for it, start slowly with the penetration. Experiment and find out what feels best for you. Some women engage in the search for the famous G-Spot, others stimulate their clitoris indirectly by pressing the vibrator towards the belly.

9. After you stopped playing, clean your toy with antibacterial wet wipes and warm water, take the batteries out (to prevent corrosion) and store it in a clean place (some toys come with a handy storage pouch).
Seems complicated? Don’t worry, once you are in the mood and start experimenting it will be natural. And trust me, it only seems kinky the first time! 🙂

Enjoy,

Nomi Tang

How to masturbate | Enjoy yourself!

Orgasms are great! And most women achieve this delightful feeling more easily while masturbating than having sex with a partner. But let’s face it, whereas male masturbation is considered to be “normal” and maybe even necessary for the boys to “let off steam”, female masturbation still remains a taboo in wide parts of today’s society. Sometimes it’s seen as dirty, a stopgap for single women, or even a betrayal of the partner.

In my mind, masturbation is natural – as generally nobody teaches us how to do it, and we still end up discovering the pleasures of solo play sooner or later in our lives. Neither do I see masturbation as a substitute for sex – or sex as a substitute for masturbation. Masturbation can rather enhance your sexual experience with your partner, as you get to know your body, explore your erogenous zones and start developing fantasies. You will be able to guide your partner while having sex with him, and make it an even more pleasurable experience for both of you.

Especially for women who have difficulties to orgasm, solo play is a nice way to train the ability to practice how to get there with a partner. And the best part about it: The journey is the reward. 😉

So, no matter if you are a regular self-pleaser or a newcomer, here are some hints how to make masturbating a really good experience:

– Make sure you are warm (literally, I mean) and comfortable, find a nice spot where no one will disturb or interrupt you (except if you like that little thrill), and chose a situation where you have plenty of time.

– To create a personal cozy atmosphere, dim the light, light some candles, dispense relaxing essential oils and put on music you like.

– Begin by touching yourself all over, paying careful attention to the areas of the body that are most sensitive. Try arching your back, fondling your breasts, or clenching and rubbing your thighs together.

– Once you’re turned on, you probably feel ready for genital stimulation.

– Move your fingers closer towards your vagina. Don’t rush and explore the outer and inner vaginal lips. If you are not sure where your clitoris is, run your finger along the inside of the vaginal lips, up toward your navel. The clitoris is protected under a hood of skin, and most women do not enjoy directly touching the clitoral glans because it is very sensitive.

– Experiment with different methods of touching yourself: rub or stroke the shaft of your clitoris, massage the labia, use your fingers as a V-shape sliding up and down. Alternate between stimulating your vagina and your clitoris, between making circles and linear movements, and between different levels of pressure.

– Maybe you would like to position a mirror in a way that you can watch yourself and appreciate the attractiveness a sexual partner would see?

– Try to add some variation to your solo play: change the position and try different toys.

– Try new places. How about a nice bubble bath? Or a place where you could be spotted, such as a restaurant bathroom?

– Once you feel comfortable touching yourself, why not let your partner watch you while doing so? I promise you he will be turned on and maybe not even let you finish by ourself, but take over 😉

I bet, once you have tried experimenting, you will be able to add infinite ideas to that list. Actually, if you would like to do so, just leave a comment! 🙂

And never forget: Masturbation is sex with a person you love.

Yours,

Nomi